Someone once asked me "What do you want?"
At the time I thought it was a strange question with too broad a context.
I searched for an answer regardless, intending to say something humourous about a knight in shining armour or vast sum of money but I remained silent for some time as my brain repeated the statement over and over in my mind coming up with next to nothing until it finally reached through the mire of useless gibberish in my consciousness to the cobwebs and dusty thoughts of my childhood. The only thing I saw there was a dead squirrel laying in the dirt beside the tall chain link fence separating the grade school I attended with the neighbouring homes. I was eleven years old. I knelt down beside it. I mourned for it. I wished I could give it life again. Eventually I covered it with dried leaves and walked on.
It was an answer, although lucid, distant, and not terribly useful but it was all I could come up with.
For the next 18 months I squirmed my way through the rest of my brain looking for a more meaningful answer. I only let go of the need to find it when I realized the only thing I truly wanted was amusement. I guess that is my way of feeling happiness.
Yes, I spent 18 months trying to find an answer to the stupid question.
Roll forward another several years of living for the sole purpose of amusement and we come to....
Now I think this stupid question is paramount and must be answered. If the question cannot be answered, then the point to life, and death, is lost.
God I'm full of shit. I have no idea what I am talking about and people should really not listen to me.... but do what you want.
Whatever. Point made.